Month: September 2023

Check Your Ego At the Door

Check Your Ego At the Door

For Growth and Overall Happiness

 

Take it from me when I say that it can be really difficult to drop the ego and allow yourself to be vulnerable.

I have always prided myself in being a high achiever, a perfectionist, a go-getter, and so highly competitive that I have built up walls and a tough exterior when I am trying new things or in a competitive environment. The very last thing I would ever do is ask for help or, worse yet, show any weaknesses in front of anyone.

The problem with that is that I cannot grow, evolve and improve in this state.

We need to get outside of our comfort zones to challenge ourselves.

And when we find ourselves challenged we need to ask for help and we need to have times of failing. That is what helps us learn and improve ourselves, our craft, or our hobby.

 

In this podcast, I take you on my journey when last week I finally put down my ego and reaped the benefits! It was humbling, exhilarating, and challenged me. In a short time I also made a new friend with similar interests who inspires me to keeping working hard. What a blessing getting out of my own way has been in just a short time. Imagine what I can accomplish now that I have this nugget of information, this new skill or letting go of my ego so that I can better myself and my life!

Won’t you join me on this new and exciting journey?

 

 

 

Has your pride, or ego, stopped you from accomplishing some of your goals (big or small)?

Then this week it’s time to bloom where you’re at and shine!

Set yourself up for success, enjoy the breathe of fresh air as you swallow that ego, show your vulnerable underbelly, and challenge yourself to something new.

You will be amazed at how happy you’ll feel about your new found freedoms from your own prison.

So get out of your own way, Warrior, and rise (and fall) in the new challenges you choose to take on.

Through failures and weaknesses we find our strengths, and build character.

Time to define your life!

So rise up, Warrior, rise up!

 

And as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!

 

Much love,.

Angie

Overcoming Fear Part 3 of 3

Overcoming Fear Part 3 of 3

Fear of Letting Go

 

As we come to the end of this three part series on overcoming fear I feel that today’s podcast of Letting Go to be a big one, especially for amputees. Not that we all don’t struggle with letting go of: the past, what we can’t control, and toxic relationships, but because as an amputee myself I have seen and heard of so many amputees struggling with these three aspects of letting go.

 

 

For most of us, not living in the past is hard. We all tend to have some part of our heart in the past. Sometimes we fear that letting go of the past will also mean we will forget something that was beautiful about it. Memories stay but that doesn’t mean that “living” there is a good thing, especially when we deeply miss some major part of it or, worse yet, can’t forgive a transgression against us that happened in the past. I know several amputees who became an amputee due to a past wrong done to them: a drunk driver, a negligent driver that they were a passenger with, and those pasts NEED to be left there. I know I can’t speak to this struggle as it is not my story nor my journey, however, I have talked with and watched the lives of people I have met that are dealing with this and one common thread amongst them is lack of joy and lack of healing.  These are the people I have seen struggling with being an amputee, finding purpose, finding joy, and those who struggle to feel peace in their new place, struggling to feel good in their prosthetic and the fit, even not healing correctly or in a timely matter. Our minds are strong and can determine how we see ourselves and our lives, dictating how we feel and function. When we get stuck in a place of anger and blaming our circumstances on a past transgression, we aren’t punishing the offender we are punishing ourselves!

Doesn’t knowing this make you want to work at forgiveness, for the sake of our own lives? You aren’t saying that what this person did to you and your life is OK, you are just letting yourself let go of the one thing that could be holding you back from recovery and living a healthy, happy life….Aren’t you worth that? (I think you are!)

 

Another aspect is letting go of things out of your control.

So you’re an amputee now. Now what?

Your limb is gone, and never growing back. Time to move forward. Learning to embrace where you are at in your journey is half the battle. You can’t change what happened, but you can control HOW you handle it. If you sit and worry about healing, the prosthesis, the fear of being or not being able to walk again, etc, you are just going to stress yourself out and you are worry about something that isn’t important right this minute. Stop, breathe, live for RIGHT now. Can you find something to be happy about, right now? I bet you can. Maybe it’s that you survived, you healed well, you aren’t on pain meds anymore. Maybe it’s that you have a family that is there for you, a friend group who is surrounding you with love, support, and prayers. Maybe it’s a pet that is glad you are home (they don’t care if you have one less leg or not!) Perspective! Do you have it? You can’t control something that has already happened to you, you can’t control how long it will take you to heal, or if your prosthetist is going to be “the one”. You can control your emotions, your outlook, your decisions. Start there, and let the Higher Powers that Be do their thing. If you spend your time worried and wondering how long before staples come out, how insurance might deny you, how long before I get a prosthesis that fits right you will be exhausted from all that worrying. That’s not productive nor is it beneficial to your health (mental or physical). Learn to let go of the things you can’t control and start dealing with the items within your control. You’ll be surprised how happy you will be.

 

 

Finally, letting go of relationships. Now, as an amputee, and one who has been listening to new amputees talk about the beginning stages of getting fitted for their first prosthetics I am highly speaking of this perspective….however, some of you listening may be in a toxic relationship, one that has been negative toward you, not supportive, or downright mean, take this as you see fit.

You do not owe anyone the benefit of sticking around when it is not in your best interest!

As I speak of this I am directing this mostly toward new amputees who think that their prosthetist is their prosthetist, no matter what. Some of you how found yourself in a hospital bed, only to wake up from an accident, missing a limb, have been given a prosthetist by the hospital and you know nothing about them. Some of you live in a small town where there is only one company and you lack options. I am here to tell you that you do NOT have to sacrifice good, personal care because of those circumstances. You CAN shop around. You can change who is handling your fitting to someone more connected with you, more caring, and understanding of YOUR situation. Even though they handle amputees day in and day out, doesn’t mean they know YOU. You are unique, even as an amputee. What works for one Above Knee Amputee, doesn’t work for another. We are all different, from our age, how we became an amputee, our health and activity level, etc. These all determine how we handle a prosthetic, to how it fits, and what kind we need.

Unfortunately, we consider our prosthetist, like doctors, as the professional and take their word on all matters about our fitting. The problem is, we are the professionals of our own body and we know what feels good and what doesn’t. It’s ok to speak up. It’s ok to communicate and ask for changes. And it is definitely ok to change who you are using when you feel that you are not getting the care that you need.  Most of us don’t want to “rock the boat” and don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings, and you don’t have to. You just need to know when you’ve given your prosthetist several opportunities to make things right by you and when to cut ties and move on. You CAN interview other prosthetists to get the “best fit” for your situation and personality, after all, you will have them in your corner for the rest of your life. You deserve the best!

 

 

This week there are several things you can be doing to overcome the fear of letting go:

The Past:

Try to stay focused on the present. Letting go of past hurts and mistakes can be hard and some days will be harder than others. Just keep telling yourself that you forgive_________, and repeat it over and over again. Find ways to stay in the present and start finding goals to occupy your time. Letting go of past hurts and mistakes, or even heartbreak of losing a limb, just keep living in the now and finding the joy in the day to day events. Over time you will feel the weight of the past giving way to joys of future journeys.

The Uncontrollable:

It’s inevitable that we worry about things out of our control, so don’t fret when you succumb to that way of thinking. Recognize that you are worrying about something you can not control and refocus on what is in your control.  This takes mindfulness. You must be present and in the moment to see what you are doing and how it is not helpful. Redirect your thinking to what you CAN do in that particular situation and focus on that. Practice, practice, practice. This one is hard to let go of, but your heart and body will thank you when you do!

Relationships:

This goes out to those new amputees who feel like they aren’t in the right m medical office. Don’;t be afraid to communicate exactly what’s going on with your limb. If you still feel like you aren’t getting the care that you need, and the changes being made so you are comfortable then maybe it’s time to shop for a new provider. Don’t be afraid to do what’s right by you. It’s your life, after all! And you deserve the very best care. Be patient, be kind, but when push comes to shove, if you don’t feel like you are being heard, or time isn’t being spent on you to make necessary adjustments so you are out of pain, then it’s time to say good-bye to the old and find someone new. You deserve to be happy and feel the best you can in your prosthesis.

 

I hope this series on fear helped you in some way or another. If you feel like you know someone that this could speak to, please like and share.

I appreciate each of you and hope you are living your best life.

Until next we and as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!

 

Much love,

Angie

Overcoming Fear Part 2

Overcoming Fear Part 2

Fear of Failure

 

A big fear of mine has always been failing, especially in front of a lot of people. How about you?

After becoming an amputee this became the daily fear that would well up inside of me. Every day I put on my leg I had to deal with idea that, as I was learning to walk in it, I just my wipe out.  Then after I got good at walking, I added in the fear of falling with a running blade on, which would make for a more epic fall.

It feels like the normal, everyday, things were now causing my anxiety.

I realized right away that I would have 2 choices:

Stay home, pout, and not get out and work on my new life

or

Get out, try everything, fail, pick myself back up and try again.

On the edge of the Grand Canyon!

 

Me and my bees

 

My new Swell Surf foot, ready for the waves of Kauai

 

My 1st time wadding in a rushing stream, keeping balance, and trying fly fishing! A whole lotta new!

 

As you probably guessed, I opted for the second choice! Get out and LIVE!

This took time, patience, humility, and drive.

It wasn’t easy going into a grocery store with a new leg, knowing people were watching, almost waiting for me to stumble. At least that’s how it felt at first. But I had a family to feed and a husband at work all day. I was not going to be a burden and I was going to learn this new lifestyle, no matter what it took.

As a teacher, I told my students all the time that it’s ok to fail. That’s the only way to learn. It was time for me to take my own advice.

It’s a long road, a hard journey, when learning to walk again. It’s difficult to take an old. easy, everyday task, and start over.

Have grace and forgiveness with yourself. Be patient, like you’d be with your own kids learning something new.

What advice would you give your baby who was just learning to walk? Would you be mad at them for trying their first steps and falling over? Of course not, so why would you be mad, upset, impatient with yourself?

Why is it that we are so hard on ourselves, yet so forgiving with others that we seeing trying and failing?

Remember, it is more rewarding to try, try, try again and get something, than to just be able to do something simple that you get on your first try.

When you are forced to subject yourself to uncertainty, and yet certain failures at first, you are building your experience, you are building your character, and you are building a warrior mentality.  These are the characteristics that will help you succeed at your next task.

Don’t be afraid to get out there and try something new. You never know what will come of your efforts. What I have learned is that with every trial, I became stronger, met new people, inspired others, and found a deep joy for my new life that I wouldn’t change for the world!

 

Deep inside of you lies a warrior waiting to be unleashed! You’ve got this. Face your fears head on and watch how you will transform your life!!!

You are a warrior!!

 

 

This week begin to change your mindset. Speak positively to yourself and then think of 1 thing you have been wanting to do but have been too afraid to try it.

Now make a plan on how to get from point A to point B. Remember to break it down into baby steps. You cvan do this. I believe in you!

Work at it every day, even for 5-10 minutes. Realize that learning to do something new takes failure. Embrace the failures. Even laugh at yourself from time to time. We all fail at first.

Pick yourself back up and start again!

Don’t give up!

You’ve got this!!

 

Until next time,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

Angie

 

Overcoming Fear: Part 1

Overcoming Fear: Part 1

Fear of the Unknown

 

We all face challenges in life and more than that we all struggle with how uncomfortable it is to not know what’s going to happen.

 

We get fixated on the “what ifs” and begin a dangerous road of fearing the future, the outcomes, the unknown.

This isn’t living, and this isn’t healthy.

As I navigated 4 months from deciding to amputate my leg above the knee until the surgery date I ran the gamut of emotions, questioning my decision, wondering if it was the right choice, pondering and fretting over the “what ifs”.

Let me tell you, there are a LOT of “what ifs” when you have 4 months to think about it. What happened to me within that 4 month time frame was nothing short of a miracle and one that I will forever be in awe over.

Something changed within myself, in my deepest part of my subconscious that day in November 2018, just a month out from my surgery. I was transformed from worrying about a future I couldn’t even fathom to a place of peace.

At that moment I began living for each moment and knew that I was going to be alright, no, more than alright, I was going to overcome and be a fighter.

This is an opportunity for each of you as you navigate your journey called life. You don’t have to be ruled by fear of the unknown, but embrace the moments that you are living in.

A quick reminder to let go and live for the moment. Let go of what you cannot control.

 

Finding peace in the moment, being totally present and letting go of what you cannot control.

You deserve that happiness.

You deserve to live a full and healthy life.

Smile more!

 

 

 

 

Today, I want you to let go of what you cannot control, take several deep breathes, and allow the warrior within you out.

Fight the battles of today.

Let go of what is uncertain- your tomorrow.

 

You are a warrior,

You are wonderfully made,

You are special!!

 

And as always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!

 

Much love,

Angie