Tag: communication

The Struggle is Real

The Struggle is Real

The Leg is Fake

 

“Humor can alter any situation and help us cope at the very instant we are laughing.”

-Allen Klein

If I didn’t laugh I would cry… Oh wait, I did cry!

Yep, it was that kind of week for me. It happens, and I wanted you to hear what it’s like for me when I fall on hard times, because it does happen.

I began doing some treadmill work last week and believe I hit a nerve in my residual limb, making it angry. Then 2 days later I pinched a nerve in my back and off we went! Serious pain shooting down my legs, creating massive phantom pains in my residual limb and beyond.

To top this fun adventure off I was also having to fast all day Sunday and then most of Monday for a health exam that I wasn’t excited about. Between nerve pain, pinched nerve, fasting, and anxiety about an appointment, it was the perfect storm and an epic test of my mental fortitude.

As I sat around hurting beyond belief, I was thinking of all the things I talk about on my podcast and how to cope with hard times. It was then that I realized that I needed to practice what I preach. I had to dig down real deep to find the strength, the pain was so intense, and I was also sleep deprived, did I mention that? I couldn’t just sit and let it get to me, and I couldn’t take it out on the ones I love and who have supported me on this journey, so I needed to practice positivity, embracing the moment for what it was, remember that it won’t last forever, and breath.

It wasn’t easy. I had to keep starting over and re-adjust my thinking. I failed time and time again to, mentally, get past the pain. I had to remember everything I’ve been speaking about and be honest about where I was at. …

I was in a valley!

I went from the peak of a mountain top just 7 days ago, and within a blink of an eye, I was in the depths of the valley, looking for a way out. THIS was the place I had spoken about, the place I had told you happens to each of us, and it came out of nowhere and without warning.

The positive side, you ask? There’s only one way from here, and that’s up!

I am ready, I want to be on the top of the mountain, I have a new appreciation for the joys of mountain tops and a deep desire to be there again. That is my goal! It will always be my goal.

Mountain tops and valleys

 

 

This week I want you to practice breathing to gain composure when you’re hurting.

Use a Body-Scan to assess each of your body parts, find where your pain is coming from, acknowledge it and then move on from it. If the pain draws you back to that area, revisit, acknowledge again, and move on. Do not give that area any power over your focus and time during this scan.

Finally, communicate with the people around you when you fall into that valley. Keep them informed of what you are dealing with and what you need… maybe even apologize, in advance, for not being you.

You are a warrior!

You are perfect the way you are, and strong enough to get through this.

Speak positive, and know that you are capable, loved, and enough!

 

As always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!

 

Much love,

Angie

Fluid, Flexible, but Ferocious

Fluid, Flexible, but Ferocious

Managing Expectations

 

Sometimes we just feel like nothing is going right, we can get down on ourselves, or worse,  OTHERS, because of what we are going through.  When we expect certain things to go a certain way we can be setting ourselves up for a let down of epic proportions.  I’m not saying you shouldn’t strive for your best, or to set those types of expectations/goals for yourselves. You should always work at achieving something greater than where you are at now, for example, if you want to walk to your mailbox, with your prosthetic, but have only gotten to the end of your driveway, then go for it. It’s achievable but will take hard work, time, and positive attitude.  What I am referring to is how you feel in your prosthetic or what you are expecting from your prosthetist.

My prosthetists: Randy and David
The Limb Center

Teamwork!

The work room where Randy does all his magic!

Be forewarned, you need to know the difference between a prosthetist who is giving his or her all to you and those who aren’t. You also need to know if you are just expecting too much. Remember, you lost your limb, nothing can replace the real thing. What you ARE looking for is something that will be doable to get around on and is comfortable enough NOT to cause any other issues, such as: blisters, infection, bruising, etc.  YOU have to know the difference between when you are expecting too much or when your prosthetist isn’t giving enough. And that, my friends, takes time and listening to your gut.

 

You can best determine if you are getting the best care possible if your questions are being addressed, your concerns are being heard, and actions are being taken to assure your best interests are being met.  If in your gut you feel you aren’t being heard, or given proper time to address issues you are having, then you probably aren’t in the right office.  However, you also need to understand that no practitioner is going to be able to give you ‘perfect’.  There is no such thing, and you need to manage THOSE expectations and find a common ground, one where you feel good enough about your fit, and aren’t in major pain.  My leg I have right now, after almost three years, feels the best….but it’s not perfect.  I can deal with what I have to deal with because it’s better than it’s ever been.  I have to know that this is a good thing, I lowered my expectations to an 80-90% pain free, versus looking for 100% pain free.  And I’m ok with that. I am also a better, happier, thus healthier ME, because I have come to terms with not feeling perfect.

Catch my drift?

You don’t need to settle, that’s not what I am saying, but know the difference of getting good, quality health care versus high expectations that NO ONE could possibly supply you.

I’m the lucky one. I had an amazing doctor who directed me to two of the most kind, caring and talented prosthetists around.  They care about me, my lifestyle, and making my life the best they can give.  I ask questions, tell them my symptoms and they work with me to achieve that. I don’t complain or blame them for ill-fitting sockets, I just ask for their help to make it better. I communicate clearly about what’s going on and they do the rest.  We work together and make it a “give and take” relationship that works. After all, it’s going to be a long ride with these guys.

 

 

Work on journaling your feeling and where you are struggling.  Try to keep track of and acknowledge the time of day, weather, and other factors that could be causing you issues. Is there a common thread? Can you work around that or fix it yourself? Is it your mindset holding you back or is it a true issue with your fit?

Practice being flexible and patient.

Understand and communicate with your practitioner about what you are going through, dealing with, and what you need. Pay attention to your body so you CAN communicate clearly.  These small things will help you give them the best shot of actually helping you, after all, you are the only one who can feel what you feel and describe what’s going right and wrong. It’s our job to communicate clearly and accurately so they can help us to the best of their ability.

Let go off perfection. It won’t ever get there but those thoughts will make you grumpy and frustrated with everything going WRONG that you’ll forget to focus on what is going right. Be positive!

 

You can do this, I believe in you!

Change your mindset,

Stay positive,

Find a level of comfort you CAN live with and

Get out and live your life!!!

 

As always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

Angie

 

Shop Talk with Randy West

Shop Talk with Randy West

How about that fit, though?

Randy, my prosthetist, with the cast of my residual limb

 

This is the first step, for some prosthetists, when it comes to making their patient’s next socket. There are many steps, and it can be frustrating with how long it can take, only to realize you may need to make a bunch of corrections to the final socket over the course of the following weeks of receiving it.  It is a process, like everything in life, and can test your resolve and patience.  But  stay the course, my friend!  If you have an amazing prosthetist, like I do, then let them work their magic and make the adjustments.  It’ll be a better fit in the long run and you’ll be a better, well-adjusted person conquering the world once again.

Adjustments need to be made, over and over again! Thanks, Randy!

 

But what if you don’t feel like you’re being heard or, better yet, being blamed for the fit not working for you?  That’s when you may need to seek outside help and opinions….and NOT from strangers on social media but from practicing professionals.  It may take some time and effort on your part but it’s ok to shop around and talk with other prosthetists. Having a new set of eyes on the issues you may be having with your fitting is your prerogative and your right.  This is YOUR life after all.

Teamwork makes the dream work!
And even professionals will ask for a new set of eyes to help them make it right for you…or at least they should-It’s called humility.

 

Communication and listening are two qualities you should look for in a prosthetist. they should be willing to take the time that is needed, not allotted, to talk with you and understand your pains, concerns and issues with your fit.  If they can’t do that, listen to your gut and find someplace else to go.

Listen in to today’s podcast where I talk with my prosthetist about the types of sockets, how to handle office visits and reassuring you that it’s ok to move on if the relationship isn’t working out. We also jump into what you can do to help yourself and getting out of your own way when working with your professional.

He makes some really good points that you really should hear especially if you’re struggling right now with your fit and/or your prosthetist.

 

You can also find the interview on my YouTube channel: Angie Heuser-BAWarrior360

 

Time to get real.

I believe there are 3 components to your success with fitting and then succeeding as an amputee:

Physical, Emotional, Mental

First, get past the amputation-or with whatever you are struggling. This is the mental component and it might be taking you in the wrong direction. If you are still struggling with being an amputee then you need to figure out how to right this or you won’t be able to move on. Stop looking into the past, at what you had, or how you were wronged. To be successful at anything, not just being an amputee, you need to embrace where you are NOW.  Find someone to talk to, create a journal, add to your vision board, do something to get you to look forward and not in the past.

Make time for you and embrace the journey YOU are on.

 

 

Second, it’s ok to be sad, angry, disappointed at where you are. Express that emotion and then move on. It’s not ok to dwell in that negativity, it will only lead to other issues such as health issues. Your body isn’t designed to stay in a stressed, angry phase for long periods of time and it will eventually start to react to the negativity. You don’t need more issues on top of what you are already dealing with, so deal with your emotions- now!  Use the above ideas to help you get started.

Finally, the physical aspect. As amputees we need to get a great fitting socket or life can get harder than it already is. You need to be in the right office, with the right prosthetist, who listens to you and takes your scenario to heart. But you are responsible for communicating well,  and giving him/her your best. if the above two aspects are a struggle for you then this physical aspect is going to be tough. Your mind has to be in the right place because the physical side of amputation is demanding. We must be strong, courageous, willing to push through some hard stuff, just to get exactly what we need to live a full and healthy life.

It is an uphill battle some days, but the view from the top is amazing! Get after it!

 

You can do this!

Don’t give up. Ask questions, get help, talk it out with people who love you and listen.

You will get through this, and when you do, you’ll be all the more stronger and badass for it!!

 

As always,

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

Much love,

Angie

The Journey Called Life

The Journey Called Life

Have Grace With Yourself Through Life’s Ups and Downs

The valleys in life allow us to see the beauty of the mountain tops

 

Moving has been the focus of my every moment this past 3-4 weeks and it has been exhausting. I have pushed myself to the max to get things unpacked and to make our new house look like a home. I have rubbed my residual limb raw, created some serious pains that have taken my breathe away, and made my “good leg” ache with all the work it has done to compensate for the lack of not having another limb. With all the craziness of life I have ignored the fit of my socket, until now. I am finally getting fit for a new socket and am excited with the idea of a closer fit, but anxious with having to cope with a new fit that will inevitably cause pains as I adapt to it.

With the good comes the bad. With the highs come the lows, and life is a journey. We must always remember that life isn’t a sprint but a marathon. I need to remember that. I can get impatient at times, and frustrated by the problems and set backs I encounter on a day to day/week to week basis.

I need to remember to stop and smell the roses( or in my case, today, sunflowers), and enjoy the journey. Today was one of those days when everything just came to a head for me, emotionally, and I got so angry and frustrated. You know, the kind of emotion that makes you want to give up and take a nap…. or stress eat!

I’m proud of myself, I did neither! Instead I went through with recording my podcast. Take a listen to hear what happened today that put me in a tail spin. As I spoke to you all about it, I realized that I am truly blessed with my life and that “this too, shall pass”.  I must learn to have grace with the world, the people around me, and myself.  I believe we have these moments to remind ourselves of all the good that is in our life. Without the valleys how can we appreciate the mountain tops? I sometimes forget how good my life is and how blessed I am. I need to remind myself to be grateful, even through the problems.

I hope you can see how blessed you are with who and what you have in your life, even when things aren’t so perfect. If we can just see the positives we can eliminate stressors that can harm our health.  Our attitude and outlook on our life can create a healthy life or make us sick.  Being unhappy, grouchy, and angry can really harm our health and  destroy our recovery from sickness or surgery. Try positivity. You might be surprised on how great you’ll start feeling AND you’ll also see the world change, for the better, all around you, all because of how you carry yourself. I don’t see myself as disabled or handicapped. I like to smile at people who look at me, staring at my leg. When I smile and they smile back then I know they see me for ME, then a chain  reaction occurs, of happy vibes…. at least in my life and at my house.  Try it!! The world needs more positive vibes- why not be the person who starts it? Be the change!

 

 

Today’s Call to Action:
Write down 5 things that you are grateful for. Maybe it’s people in your life, or your pet. Maybe its the health you DO enjoy, or a memory. Maybe it’s simply that cup of coffee with a friend or that moment you had to watch the sunset. Just be thankful! Then post your list somewhere that you can see it everyday. Maybe on your mirror in your bathroom, or next to your bed at night.

Better yet, can you write 5 things for which you are grateful for 7 days in a row?

Send me a message and tell me what you are grateful for. Our gratefulness is contagious!

I am grateful for each of you!! Thank you for reading, listening, and following my journey!

 

And as always:

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!!

 

A little bit of sunshine to make me smile

 

Much love and admiration,

Angie

 

I Am Who You Say I Am

I Am Who You Say I Am

How My Faith Saved Me and Made Me Who I Am Today…..

HIS!

Faith: the assurance of what is hoped for, with the conviction of what is unseen.

 

This podcast goes deep as I share the other half of my story, the side of my story that I have only just recently shared with people outside my circle.  This story that gives you a glimpse into my Faith and belief system that has been in place all my life but really grounded me the most the past several years…. especially the months right before my amputation.

 

I don’t want to go into much detail here as I hope you listen because the raw emotion that spilled out during my recording I don’t share lightly, and am sort of embarrassed by as I don’t lose it like that when I record my episodes.

This side of my journey is special and a sacred part of my journey that I have decided was time to tell, in hopes it may help someone else.  Please listen, please share, please subscribe to my emails so you don’t miss an episode.

 

This past week I was blessed to go speak to a women’s Bible study group and share my faith journey. This stirred in me that people want and need to hear these type of stories, if only to build hope in this world we are living in.

Thank you to my good friend, Laurie Porter, for inviting me to speak, and to the ladies of the Fountain Hills Presbyterian Church, here in Arizona, for allowing me the time to speak and share my story with you. I am truly blessed to have met each of you and call you friends.


Grateful to these ladies for opening up their study group to me so I could share my story
and to my Dad who is in visiting from Illinois. What a trooper being surrounded by all these women!

 

 

My first socket-I chose a saying that helped me get through those hard firsts of prosthetic wearing.

 

Today’s is simple;

If you believe then really BELIEVE. God has got you no matter the circumstance, no matter the fight or battle you are in. Let go and stop trying to control the situation. Listen, be quiet, see what He is trying to say to you.

If you aren’t a believer then ask questions. If you are intrigued by my story and the words I spoke then please reach out to me. I’d love to share more with you and answer your questions. You are never too late to find this unique relationship I spoke of.

 

And as Always:

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!!

 

Much love,

Angie

Support is a 2-Way Street

Support is a 2-Way Street

My support team through it all

 

My Support group
This family!! I have been so blessed by each one of them!

 

The people you surround yourself with is a very important component to your success, I’d say it’s number 2 just behind your ATTITTUDE and MINDSET.

Surround yourself with people who know you, can support you physically and emotionally,  and know when to give and when to step back. Communicate with them, let them know exactly what you need so help is relevant and helpful.

Likewise, if you are someone’s support person, make sure you listen and hear what they need. Sometimes you’ll see struggles, but they need to have that to become stronger. It’s ok to have to fight to make change happen, just know when the fight becomes too hard or the battle is being lost, that you step in before defeat is felt.

This podcast I am dedicating to those 3 amazing people you see in the photo above, my husband and best friend for 32 years-Erik, and my two sons-Colby and Peyton. Without them by my side I don’t think I would’ve gotten this far. Between making meals, going to PT sessions with me, picking up the house and doing laundry, to motivating me (without even knowing it) to be better, to heal, and to get back on my feet at all costs was a priceless gift these past 8 years.  But I’m a lucky one, my support came from within my home, I had access to it everyday, all day. Some people aren’t so lucky.  Do you know someone in your neighborhood, or in your friend circle who is living life alone and in need of support? A lot of times they won’t ask for help, you just have to take the first step and go talk to them. Bring them a coffee, bake cookies or bread, maybe run to the store and bring them something cheerful like a bouquet of flowers. These steps will open doors to allowing them to ask for help.  I promise you, that filling someone’s bucket will also fill yours, two-fold!

 

Today, there are 2 separate call to actions:

If you have been GETTING SUPPORT from someone as you heal or get through whatever it is that you’ve been dealing with, here’s what I have for you today:

**Say thank you! Let them know you see them and appreciate those who have been helping you. Send them a quick note, email, or phone call. Maybe send them flowers or better yet, take them flowers, if you’re able to do so. These small gestures will make them feel amazing and loved and seen for all they’ve done for you and “fill their bucket”.

A simple Thank You goes a long ways.

If you have been SUPPORTING someone:

**Take time for yourself! Yep, you heard me right, stop helping for a little while and escape! If you like to read go spend quality “you” time reading a magazine or a book you’ve been wanting to read, dedicate a little time everyday to rest and recharge yourself. You’ll be a better caretaker if you do. If you like to get out and grab a coffee with a friend, go do it! If you can, go get a massage, a facial, or get your nails done. If you feel recharged and beautiful you’ll be a better person and ready for anything thrown your way. But you need “YOU” time, without a doubt.

Don’t feel guilty. Don’t ignore your own wants and needs. If you are in a really needy situation with the person who you are helping, then you need to be at your best, and you can’t be at your best if you get burnt out.

Please check in with me, tell me how your Call to Action is going this week and what you did for the person helping you, or for yourself if you are a helper.

And as always, until next time:

Be Healthy,

Be Happy,

Be YOU!

 

Much Love,

Angie

Me and my guy doing what we love. Grateful to be here after the journey I’ve been on.
Couldn’t have done it without him.

 

 

A little R & R for the one who has helped me through all this “stuff”.